Pulling Back The Skin
by fadingvoice
Summary: Sequel to Hanging By A Moment, where KrisxJunior face difficult choices and people who try to pull them apart.
1. The Seed We've Sown

"So you and Junior are together?" David asked as I prepared Wildfire for workouts.

"Yes!" I said happily, putting the reins on Wildfire.

"That's great," he replied half-heartedly.

"You don't sound very happy..." I told him.

"Well...Oh, shut up!" he shouted playfully. "Get on the dang horse and ride!" Quickly, I got on Wildfire and did what I was told. Once the workouts were done, I tried to continue the conversation.

"You don't sound very happy that I'm with Junior," I informed him.

"Well, I'm not," he agreed. "Look," he stopped.

"What?" I asked eagerly.

"I told you, I like you. I'm letting things take their course, but I like Kris Furillo." I stood their dumbfounded. All that time I'd thought he'd been totally on board for Junior and I being together. "I'm going to do whatever it takes to break the two of you up, and I'm not going to let any guy stand in my way of being with you."

"You know that sounds sort of stalkerish," I joked.

"Yeah, it does," he replied, considering what his words would've sounded like to others' ears. "But it's true. Junior's not going to stand in my way of having you."

"I'm not an object to obtain," I informed him. "I'm a person."

"But I still want you," he said playfully.

"It's alright," I replied. "Our love with hold."


	2. Love's Not Cooked Up Overnight

"You sure about that?" David questioned.

"Yeah," I answered. "Why?"

"Because it didn't hold up the last two times," he reasoned.

"That's because I was an idiot, and the times weren't right. Now...Now it's time. We're together, and it'll last." I assured him.

"Don't be so certain," David insisted.

"And why is that?" I asked.

"Because if, and when, you and Junior fall apart-"

"Not gonna happen," I corrected him.

"Then there'll be a guy to come and steal you away," he continued.

"And that guy will be you?"

"Exactly."

"Kerry and Matt were the guys to pick up the pieces, and look how they ended up," I informed him.

"But, like I said, I know how to play the game." he countered.

"Love's not a game," I told him.

"Love's not," he agreed. "But finding it is."


	3. Friday Night

"Kris!" Junior called from the mansion.

"Coming," I shouted. "Bye, David."

"Bye, Kris," he regretfully replied.

Once I got to Junior he asked, "Is David still flirting with you?"

"Nothing to worry about," I assured him.

"Good," he said, pulling me into his arms and gently kissing my forehead. "Because I'm not losing you to anyone."

"You're not the only one," I thought to myself.

"So what do you want to do?" he questioned. "Wanna go get some food? Maybe go back to my room..." I laughed.

"Food sounds _really_ good right now," I answered. A look of slight disappointment crossed his face, but soon again there was his famous Junior smile.

"Food it is...then to my room?" he replied.

"Junior!" I said, playfully smacking him.

"What?" he inquired innocently. "Not like we haven't done it before."

"I just want to give it a few days...months," I insisted.

"Months! Wait! Now why would we wait that long to...Oh my holy crap!" he shouted. "You're not pregnant with Matt's kid are you?"

"No! Of course not!" I assured him. "I just want to make sure that you're free of Jillian-"

"We never-"

"Emotionally." I interruppted.

"Kris," he insisted. "The only girl I care about is you."

"Junior..." I stuttered. "I wanna wait till we get married to have sex again." He looked somewhat upset, yet more shocked.

"Why?" I wined.

"Because then you'll have more to look forward to," I teased, tapping his nose with each word.

"Let's get married now," Junior suggested. As I laughed he picked me up.

"Not yet," I told him. "But soon. I'll be ready for forever soon."


	4. My Obession

"Junior!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as he walked away. "You promised."

"Kris, it's out of my hands!" he called back.

"Junior, you know Wildfire's better! Put him in the Breeders!" I screamed. He turned to face me.

"Kris, my dad made the decision!"

"But you're part of it!"

"There's nothing I can do," he said quietly. For six weeks Wildfire's times had been better than Avatar's and still, Ken Davis wouldn't let Wildfire race for Davis Ranch in the Breeders.

"Well I'm not about to sit here and watch Wildfire rot while he's better," I snapped, walking past Junior toward the mansion.

"Wildfire will race," I thought to myself. "I'll make sure of it."

"Mr. Davis!" I yelled, making sure the entire house heard me.

"In my office, Ms. Furillo." he called. Once I was inside he continued. "There's no need to scream so the entire house can hear you. Now, what is it you want?"

"Wildfire in the Breeders," I answered frankly.

"Well, that's just not possible," he replied.

"Mr. Davis, Wildfire's gotten better times than Avatar, he deserves to go." I insisted.

"Avatar is a champion horse, he'll win." Mr. Davis resisted.

"But he's getting older, Sir," I commented.

"Ms. Furillo, if you want Wildfire in the Breeders so badly, why don't you run him with another ranch?" he questioned.

"I can do that?" I asked suspiciously.

"Sure, I'm positive Avatar will win, it's no downfall to us," he explained. I smiled, said my thanks, then ran off to tell Junior.

"What ranch will you ride with?" he inquired. I had no idea, but one automatically came to mind. Raintree.


	5. The Changing Of Times

"Absolutely not, Kris," Jean insisted. "Even with your jockey license back, we can't run in the Breeders."

"Mr. Davis will let us use Wildfire. For free," I persisted.

"It's more complicated than that," Jean continued. "We need the papers-"

"If we fill them out tonight we can get them in on time for the race." I suggested.

"Kris, we just can't." Jean said, making her decision final.

"Jean, this could save the ranch," I informed her. She gave me a "why did you have to say that" glare.

"But...Oh, what do we have to lose?" she finally answered. "Let's run in the Breeders." I smiled and hugged her tightly. It hadn't been easy even getting her to open the door, but I finally did it. I excused myself and went outside to call Junior. However, my phone rang first.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hey, Kris. It's David." he said from the other line.

"Hey, David, can I call you back?" I questioned, wanting to tell Junior first.

"Kris-"

"Call you in a minute!" I snapped the phone shut as quickly as I possibly could to avoid David asking me questions. My fingers fumbled with excitement as I dialed Junior's cell.

"Junior!" I exclaimed when he picked up the phone.

"Hey, Kris." Junior replied in a less happy mood.

"What's wrong?" I questioned.

"Jillian came by, that's all." he answered.

"What'd she want?" I asked, not letting him choose a different subject.

"To see if she and I could get back together..." he paused near the end.

"And..." He didn't answer. "Oh my gosh! You're not seriously thinking of getting back together with her, are you?" No answer. I hung up the phone.


	6. I Don't Feel Very Receptive Today

"No need to try and split us up, David," I informed him. "It's already happened." He looked at me, half in shock, half in happiness. I knew I must've looked like crap at that moment, but he didn't seem to care.

"Kris, are you al-"

"I'm fine, David," I insisted. "I was just as much an idiot now as I'd ever been."

"I didn't want it to be this way," he assured me. "I wanted to win you because you loved me more than Junior." He took my hand, I pulled away.

"You haven't "won" me at all," I shouted. "Just because I'm alone doesn't mean that I'll flock to whoever wants me!" He grabbed my hand again. I lashed out in anger, slapping him. I ran. I found myself doing that often, running. This time, however, Junior didn't need to save me.

"Kris, get in." Pablo ordered angrily. "Look, keep your emotional problems out of business. David could've fired you on the spot and then where would you be?"

"Pablo, you don't understand," I cried.

"Don't understand what, Kris?" he scolded. "That you slapped a man worth more than you and I _combined_?"

"Matt and I broke up that night at the restaurant when you came to pick me up," I blurted out. "Then Junior and I were together for about a day, and then he wants Jillian again, and then...David thinks that he can have me as his girlfriend..." I mumbled the last part.

"I understand some trainers are hard," Pablo explained. "But you have to deal with it. If you don't, you're just proving that they have more control over you than just in the way you ride." I nodded. "So any good news?"

"Wildfire's going to be in the Breeders!" I shouted happily. A smile spread across Pablo's face.

"But Avatar's riding for Davis," he said, his tone confused.

"He's running for Raintree," I explained. "Mr. Davis said I could.

"Is it in print?" he questioned. I shook my head. "I'll get it in print." Pablo drove us back to the ranch to finalize the deal with legal documentation.


	7. The Greatest Actor Alive

"There. Are you happy?" Mr. Davis questioned and he capped the pen. I smiled at Pablo as he took the document in his hand, reading over the signature.

"Yeah, we're good," Pablo finally said. "I'll come back if I see any problems."

"You do that, Pablo, but you won't find any," Mr. Davis insisted. "I'm telling you, I don't need him. Avatar will win on his own." As we walked out, I called Pablo on Mr. Davis' claim.

"Is Avatar really faster than Wildfire. Wildfire's times are better." I explained.

"I know," Pablo agreed. "So why would Davis want to run with the lesser horse?"

"That is unless he wants _Raintree_ to win," I supposed. Pablo was silent. "Ken Davis wouldn't do that."

"No, his son wouldn't," Pablo corrected. "Mr. Davis has the money to spare. Don't forget he and Jean were once engaged."

"So he wants her back on her feet," I followed. "Hoping that she'll come to him and once again they can be together."

"Don't meddle in your employer's affairs," Pablo instructed.

"Well, I've already screwed up not meddling with my employer's son," I said, shrugging my shoulders.

"One mistake is enough. Just don't do it again." he insisted.

"Yeah, one mistake is enough," I repeated. I looked around the ranch and spotted Jillian and Junior at his car, Jillian leaning towards him. "One mistake is enough."


	8. Blind Behind The Wheel

"Dang it!" I thought as I walked into the mansion to find Junior eating. I turned around quickly, but he'd already spotted me.

"Kris!" he called to my back.

"Hi, Junior," I replied quietly and kept walking.

"Kris, wait!" he called again. I stopped and sharply turned around, making sure I was able to look him in the eye. "Look, I'm not back together with Jillian, I just needed to talk to her...For closure. We didn't exactly break up on the right foot, but I told Jillian I didn't want to be with her. I had you."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I questioned angrily.

"I was afraid that you'd get upset," he replied.

"More upset then I was?" I shouted, confusion obvious in my voice.

"What was I supposed to do, Kris!" he shouted back.

"Call me back! You should've called me back Junior instead of letting me think that you were leaving me for Jillian!" I raged. Junior was silent. "Oh my gosh," I took a deep breath. "You weren't sure if you were done with her or not." Another breath. "And you went out with me anyway knowing that your feelings for her weren't gone!"

"That's not true!" Junior shouted, trying to defend himself.

"I don't know what to believe, Junior! You say you love me and that you'd give up everything for me, but you still want Jillian!

"I did give up everything for you, Kris," Junior said quietly.

"What do you mean?" I questioned eagerly.

"Jillian said if I didn't comply to her demands, that she'd take her half of Davis ranch and run off with it. And she did." he explained.

"What was her demand?" I asked. He didn't reply, he didn't need to. I understood. I completely understood. It was because of me. "We'll get your half back," I assured him. "And then Jillian won't have control over us." I went over and hugged him tightly.

"I hope so, Kris," he replied. "I hope so."


	9. Waiting

"Junior," I said as we sat down to dinner. Dani and Mr. Davis had decided that every third Friday of the month they would go to dinner together, this was one of those Fridays. "I don't think I should run with Raintree." Junior looked up from his food with an astonished face.

"Kris, what makes you say that?" Junior asked.

"Well, now that you're in financial trouble, I just don't want there to be a chance of you not getting the money," I replied.

"Look, Kris," Junior explained. "You're just trying to help your family get back on your feet, and there's money for second place, too." I hid a giggle. "What?"

"It's funny, you used to hate that I cared about my family so much, and now you want me to," I reasoned. He smiled.

"They mean the world to you, Kris," Junior replied. "A family's all you ever wanted, and when you had it I wasn't happy that you weren't willing to lose it. I understand better now." He smiled.

"Look who's grown up," I joked, his boyish grin gracing his face.

"And I thought I'd be the one always screwing up," he thought aloud. "But you're the one who's lost her jockey license-" I faked a wince. "Gotten kicked out of her house-" I faked another one. "I got stuck with the slimy corporate takeover family."

"Junior," I said, faking shock, "Your family? Slimy?" I dramatically put the back of my hand to my forehead. "Never." He laughed along with me throughout the dinner.

"But really, Kris," Junior said seriously as we put our dishes in the sink. "Things will be ok. For Davis and for Raintree." I nodded, choosing to believe him. There was no point in worrying about things you couldn't change. All you could do was train and hope you won.


	10. The Photograph Is Proof

"Kris, are you ready?" David asked as I brought Wildfire to the trial starting gate. I nodded and the doors flew open. Wildfire rushed out and before I knew it, we were done.

"Good," David commented, looking at the stopwatch. "You cut five seconds off your time. Davis diet doing you good?" I made a face at this. I'd been on their diet for what seemed like forever to find that I'd lost about ten pounds. Junior believed I was too skinny but Dani thought I finally "had the weight for my height". I could literally kick her for her 500 calorie diet.

"That good?" he questioned in response to my face. I nodded. "Look, Kris," Oh crap. He was going to try and have another one of those "we can be friends until we become lovers" talk. "I don't want things to be awkward like this at work. I'm making an effort to be friends, can't you do the same?" Wow. I was wrong. He had actually wanted to explain to me how Mr. Davis could see the tension and wanted it to stop.

"I'll make an effort," I negotiated. "But it's hard to make an effort when your boss is hitting on you and probably saying how good those jeans make your butt look."

"It's hard when you want someone and they're taken," he countered.

"We don't get everything we want in life," I said with a sarcastic tone.

"I do," he replied as though I'd said nothing at all.

"Well, I guess this is going to be a first for you," I finished, turning from him and walking toward the mansion.

"Gosh dang it!" I thought as I kicked the dirt.

"What am I going to do?" I accidentally said aloud.

"What are you going to do about what?" Junior asked.


	11. Buckets For Bullet Wounds

"David," I replied quietly.

"I thought you said there was nothing to worry about!" Junior shouted.

"Junior's it's-"

"Yeah, it is!" He interrupted. "If he's still hitting you, it's a problem."

"I can't tell him how to feel about someone," I insisted.

"But you sure as heck can tell them you have a boyfriend," he said angrily.

"I did. I do. What more can you ask from me? I don't know what you want." I replied.

"You don't know what I want, Kris?" he questioned. "I want David away from you. I want you to be mine, just mine."

"I'm not a thing that you two can fight over." I commented.

"You're _my_ girl, I won't let anyone else have you."

"I'm not your's to keep," Junior's eyes filled with rage and shock. "Junior, this is a problem that we have. I mean, it's always been you wanting me for yourself. What about what I want? David is making great times training Wildfire. Wildfire is in the Breeders, Junior! Wildfire's going to win the Breeders! I won't let you and your self demands stop me!" I started walking away, but he grabbed my arm, pulling me in close.

"Is that how our fights will always end, Kris?" he whispered into my ear. "With you walking away?" I glared at him, not wanting to admit that he was right.

"Are we always going to have fights because you're being possessive?" I snapped back. A grin spread across his face. "What's that for?" I demanded.

"You misunderstand my point entirely." he assured me. "I just don't like your coworkers hitting on you."

"And I just don't like you assuming that I can't handle it myself."

"I trust you, Kris...I just don't trust him."

"Well I guess that's something you'll just have to get over." I smirked. Junior said nothing, just staring at me as though I was supposed to be the one to say something next. After waiting for his reply, I decided I'd had enough. I didn't mind if this way how our fights always ended, it was easiest. Running away.


	12. In A Coma

I felt a hand grasp my wrist and I jerked to a stop.

"Is this how you want the relationship to be, Kris?" I turned around and looked him right in the face.

"You have no right to say that!" I shouted at him, forcing him hands from me. His face was filled with a shock, although unexpected.

"Maybe I don't, but I do have the right to want what's best," he replied. I glared at him angrily.

"It's _your_ fault!" David's eyes filled with an emotion I couldn't even describe.

"You really think it's _my_ fault?" he questioned. "It's Junior's fault, Kris! He doesn't trust you!"

"And can you blame him? You hit on me with every chance you get!"

"You can't blame a man for his desires!" David countered.

"You're right," I agreed. "But it's your job to keep them in check." From there, I walked away, hoping that David would take this conversation as the wall between professional relationship and more than a friendship.

"Kris, you alright?" Danny asked as I rushed past her.

"Yeah," I replied, not stopping. She shrugged her shoulders and continued on her way.

My room was a comfort. Dark and quiet, no one to yell, to tell me what to do. Falling into my thoughts, I laid down on the bed, contemplating the words we said. I recall Junior's tone. I'd been afraid to lose me to my family, and now? I wasn't certain of anything. There was an opening at my door, I didn't look up, but I knew who entered.

"Kris, you know this isn't right," he told me throught the darkness. I didn't move. "Kris," No reply. "Kris, ple-"

"You're right, there's a problem here," I finally replied. "And it's time we finally fix it, for good."

"How do you suppose we do that?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said honestly.


	13. Hello Alone

"What do you mean you're leaving?" I questioned. There was a small moving truck attached to the car in front of it.

"Look, Kris, it's obvious that we need time apart," he replied, putting another bag into the truck.

"I need you!" I shouted. "We all need you!" He shook his head.

"If you needed me, we would've settled things a long time ago." I stood there in shock and agony, watching him put the rest of his bags into the moving truck.

"Please," I begged. "Don't go." Small tears began rolling down my face. He turned to me, whiping away the tears with his thumb.

"It was never meant to be." he insisted.

"If that's true, then why is it that we work so well together?" I snapped. He looked he right in the eye, his own eye unsure.

"We both need to grow into who we're meant to be before we can cross paths again." I shook my head, wrapping my arms around him, hoping to force him to stay.

"What's going on?" a far away voice questioned. I didn't bother to answer.

"No, please stay!" I pleaded. Now floods were streaming from my eyes.

"Kris, if I stay here, I'll rot."

"Please." He forced himself from my embrace, getting into the car. He started the engine. For a minute, I thought he was reconsidering, not really leaving, just scaring me. However, such thoughts were foolish as he started pulling on to the driveway. As soon as the car began to go down it, I started running after him. Running, always running. Away from people or toward people, I could never be sure. Running away had brought me to him, now he was running from me. I followed him a few streets down, but eventually had to stop. All I could do was watch him drive into the distance. He was gone.


	14. There Is No Mathematics In Love and Loss

The walk back to Davis Ranch was a long one. I felt nothing. Thought nothing. Everything around me might as well not have existed. I didn't want to go in the moment I saw the large gates. I didn't want to face the haunting truths that awaited me inside. However, I didn't have a chance to turn.

"Kris!" I stood there, hoping my pleas that I couldn't speak would reach them. "Kris!" I was soon wrapped in warmth, still unmoving. "Kris, are you ok?" I didn't respond. Surely they knew that I wasn't alright. How could I be? "Come on, we're going inside." They took my hand and began walking. I didn't take a step. "Come on, Kris. You need to come inside." Still unresponsive. Frustrated, they came, flung me over their shoulder, and began walked toward the mansion.

"Kris? You awake." I took in my surrondings. The Davis couch, Junior sitting at the end of it.

"Yeah," I replied. "I'm awake."

"Good." He breathed a sigh of relief. "Last night you wouldn't say anything. "Sorry, went into nervous breakdown."

"I know now's not a good time to be asking this-"

"You're right, it's not." He leaned his neck back.

"But I have to know," he insisted.

"Junior, we're in fight mode right now." I explained. "And I don't feel like talking to you if I know I'm gonna bite your head off. Or you mine, whoever gets to the other first." A boyish grin came to his face.

"Just tell me one thing," He waited for my nodd. "Do you love him?"

"Not in that way," I assured him.

"That's not the answer I was looking for."


	15. Under Serious Attack

It'd been three days since David left. I was a complete and total mess. Maybe I shouldn't have been, it was like Junior'd left, but I felt that emptiness just the same. Junior hadn't spoken to me since our conversation on the couch. I was honest, what more could he ask for? Was I not allowed to love a guy like a brother? I still didn't understand. Now that Junior and I were finally together, it seemed like he did everything in his power to pull us apart. He was just so...jealous. I didn't like that. I felt like I was in a cage, unable to have others in my life. That wasn't where I wanted to be.

"Junior?" He looked up from his TV. I came and sat at the edge of his bed. "We need to talk."

"Yeah," he agreed. "We do."

"You wanna start?" He nodded.

"Why were you so shocked that David left? Why'd you go chasing after him? Why-"

"David was more than my trainer! He was a really good friend! He hadn't even told me that he was leaving, Junior! I didn't even get to say goodbye." I shouted.

"Kris, he flirted with you. He wanted to be with you! You aren't friends with someone like that!"

"He never crossed the line! He never tried to break us apart! All he wanted was for me to be happy! Why can't you want that?" I snapped. "Why can't you want that?" I rushed out of his room, not letting him continue.


	16. Sinking Ships

"Maybe I was wrong," I thought to myself as I took Wildfire into his stall the next morning. "Maybe David didn't love me as much as I thought he did." Once I'd finished my chores, I decided to brush Wildfire. Instead of finding his brush, I found a letter.

_Kris,_

_You know how much I adore you, but you're not you. Ever since you began going out with Junior, you've been on an emotional rollar coaster. Up and down to no end. I don't want that for you, and I can't stay here and watch you wither away knowing that there's nothing I can do about it. I love you, Kris. I honestly do. But until you can be the Kris I fell in love with, I can't stay._

_As Always,_

_David_

I folded the letter up, knowing in my mind that what I was doing could get me killed, but I had to do it anyway.

--Sorry for the short post;;;;--


	17. Dead By Dawn

Once again, I was doing something that would mostlikely get me in more trouble than I was ready for. Everything was ready, except that I wasn't. I didn't know how I was going to pull this off. How they weren't going to find me if they came looking. I didn't know any of it. However, this had never stopped me before. All that had mattered then was saving Wildfire. Now, Wildfire usually seemed like the last thing on my mind. David was right, I wasn't me. But it wasn't the person David thought I was that I wanted to be, either. I'd let myself, in general, slip away. Recalling the first day I'd come to Raintree, I was ashamed of how much I'd done that I'd sworn I'd never do. "All I want is a family," I'd said. And I got one. But then I screwed it up. I screwed it up because I wanted more. _I_ wanted everything to be perfect. To live a life where I didn't have to worry about money anymore. And so, to gain perfection, I put everyone I loved in danger. I hadn't been a person I could be proud of. And now, I needed to be; or Junior and I would never work.

"Let's go, Wildfire," I whispered, and we began our gallop through the dark.

Again, sorry for another short one, but I'm really busy, so I'm trying to get in quick posts when I can.


	18. In A Lose, Lose Situation

"Kris Furillo, you are hearby under arrest for the theft of Wildfire, property of Davis Ranch." I scoffed to myself, thinking how I should've known that Ken Davis wouldn't simply let me run off with a pricey horse. I found myself in the Siera Nevada Mountains, actually. I hadn't expected to get this far. I'd expected that I'd be arrested the moment I left the property, but apparently, I had a bit of a head start on them.

Once taken down to the local station, I was handcuffed to a car, awaiting the Davis' arrival. About an hour later, Junior showed up.

"Kris, what the heck are you doing?" he questioned angrily. I stared at him for a moment, wondering if this was really the man I'd fallen in love with. He seemed so much older, as though his youth had been taken from him.

"Riding Wildfire," I explained.

"What were you thinking?" He obviously wanted more details.

"I wasn't," It sounded like a pitiful answer, but I had no other reason to give. I couldn't exactly tell him that I ran away because I did feel at all like myself anymore, that'd be like telling him that I wasn't really in love with him. But I was in love with him, wasn't I? Pushing doubts aside, I took a deep breath, anticipating a threat.

"You weren't thinking? Why in the world does a girl steal a horse, ride into the middle of nowhere, and leave everything she knows behind?"

"I've done it before," Junior's face was stern, obviously not thinking that it was funny.

"Kris, now Wildfire won't be ready for the Breeders."

"You've seen him, haven't you? He's more fit than ever."

"But that's not the point!" he shouted.

"Then what is?"

"Why did you run away again?"


	19. The Need To Feel Alive

I didn't want to talk about it. And Junior knew it to.

"It's because David means more to you than you're letting on, right?" Junior questioned, taking a seat.

"No, that's not it." I insisted.

"Then what is it, Kris?" His voice quivered with anger. "You haven't been yourself since David left."

"Because I'm not me!" I shouted, wanting to get up but knowing that the handcuffs were a minor detail that would hold me down.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that all I've done since I've gotten out of Raintree is depend upon everyone else and I do what I know is wrong. I do what I know will hurt everyone else, and I don't care. That shouldn't be me. I'm ashamed of me." Junior sat back in shock, unsure of how to handle his girlfriend freaking out on him.

"Kris," he started. "We all change. I still love you. I will always love you, no matter what phases you go through. Ok?" I nodded, knowing I didn't have much choice.

"I'm sorry, Junior. I know this isn't really what you want to see after all that you've been through."

"No, I think we needed this talk."

"_You_ needed this talk," I thought. I still loved him, I just wasn't sure about loving myself. How can one love someone when they don't love themselves?

"Me too," I agreed, nodding my heading, knowing that I'd probably steal Wildfire away a few days from now, this time taking a route to Mexico or some other country where they won't find me. Where I can finally be free. Free to feel the wind in my face. Let my hair run wild. Let Wildfire become one with the air.

"Let's go home," Junior suggested. I nodded in agreement.


	20. Trust In Me Now

The next day, I found myself in the mansion again. I found that ache within me still existed, but I wasn't sure what to do about it. A moment later, there was a knock at the door.

"Can I come in?" Danni asked. I yelled for her to come in, and as she did, I felt a calm between us. "Are you alright?" I nodded, but she knew I was lying. "Look, if you love David, go for him. I know all too well that love only comes once in a while. Don't let it go for Junior." My eyes widened.

"No, I loved Junior," I assured her. I did, I really did. "It's just that I'm not happy with me." She nodded her head. She said that she'd be right back, then came up with a small booklet in her hand. When she handed it to me, I looked at her quizically.

"I'm not trying to shove religion on you, it's just that it helps you find a center," she explained. I smiled slightly, running my fingers along the page edges.

"Thanks."

"Just...Think about it, ok?" I nodded, unsure of how to respond. Danni never seemed like the kind of girl to have a faith, but apparently she was.

"Ok." Danni left then, leaving me to stare at the cover of the booklet. I wasn't really sure what to say about it. It seemed to beg me to open it, while at the same time I was afraid to. But I'd told myself that I wanted to change for the better, and if Danni was right, this would help.

I opened up to the first page, and began reading, unknowing of where it would take me. Maybe it would give me morals? Make me feel more responsible for my own actions? I honestly didn't know.


End file.
